***
1) Seven tips for setting end-of-year goals. (Bossed Up)
2) Did I seriously just buy something called a Sherpa Collared Jacket?
3) Should we exfoliate at night or in the morning? (Refinery29)
4) These $33 mauve booties and Sole Society embroidered boots are so cool.
5) Signs you may have a sexual harassment problem in your office. (Verily)
6) Under-$100 at Outnet: a hammered cuff, a chic Maje belt, a fringed high heel.
7) What 10 people wore to their Anna Wintour interviews. (The Cut)
8) 40%-off everything at LOFT. This notched blazer is a must for work.
9) How a woman’s appearance impacts her career. (CNN Money)
10) This pore-perfecting primer from Lancer is a game changer.
11) Bipartisan friendships can survive in the Age of Trump. (Town & Country)
12) Lou & Grey has the best relaxed pieces. I love this striped cowl neck top.
***
What I’m Wearing to a Fall Wedding. This ASOS premium lace midi-dress.
What I Found Informative. How to Make the Most of a Layover.
What I’m Cooking this Weekend. Pinch of Yum’s 5-ingredient green curry.
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Beautiful Asos Dress
Made that green curry last week. It is amaze balls.
I’m middle aged. Over 40. Can we talk about how bloggers blog these days. I’m not complaining. It’s just surprising to read more and more text that sounds like it was dictated, not written. I feel like I can tell if a writer is 20 or 40 these days. Is this the future? Will we all become more chatty bloggers?
My Mom teaches speech in a HS, she’s routinely horrified how no one under 18 was taught to write. Perhaps it’s because the only typing they do is on the Internet.
I have been verbally sexually harassed by a coworker after I put in my two weeks notice. He asked me to come to his office and said that I should “put it in my mouth” to keep my boyfriend (now husband) happy, among many other things. I sat there in shock, as it was never in the realm of things we discussed, and I never told management. He was 13 years older than me – had a one year old and a wife. We worked at a bank.
I’m not one to make a big deal out of things or get offended easily, that being said, a more “subtle” way that I feel sexually harassed at my current job is a few women I work with make inappropriate comments regarding my attire and appearance. I am 27 and they are all over 50. I understand we have different styles and bodies, and know not all women this age are like my coworkers. I would not describe any of them as “frumpy” and sometimes we can wear the exact same things, but the comments are still being said regarding my appearance. One of my coworkers dresses like she’s at the beach at all times and I have a separate work wardrobe.
For instance, if I wear a dress (professional, business attire) they call them “little dresses”, if an attorney emails me to ask me a question it’s because I’m “cute” not because I’m great at my job,
and they make comments about how I am trying to impress the *Federal Judge* we work for or the attorneys we work with. When I have conversations with these men, one of my coworkers will interrupt us and ask us what we were talking about. I was once accused of getting up to get a refill at an office lunch so that I could walk past the Judge, when I took a different route and did not walk by him, my coworker said, “oh I thought you just wanted to walk by him!”. The first time I met this Judge we were having a birthday party for him and they asked me to bring the cake to him with the candles lit – later the story was told like it was a Marilyn/JFK birthday moment. I have to dress down AND avoid the Judge/attorneys in front of my coworkers or else the comments will flood in. I had to approach my supervisor to ask her to stop making those comments because I was worried about any rumors developing, including mere favoritism.
As I write this, I am sure strangers will believe there MUST be something I am doing – it must be me, I must be flirty or dressing inappropriately – and that’s the problem. I am not any of those things, but I DO want to be noticed for my work ethic, personality, and intelligence. I am outgoing, friendly, and confident, but not loud and I do not want attention to be all on me. We as women need to do better. Not everything is for men and we should support each other being confident, caring about our appearance, and elevating our careers. So two articles in this post really resonated with me as I do feel stripped of my confidence when these comments are made and I do get dressed in the morning with these thoughts on my mind.
I don’t ever discuss this subject, so it was nice to vent!
I once overheard a man tell a woman “she was dressed for sex” in a pair of jeans and a oversize t-shirt. Men (and women) will put whatever feelings they want onto your clothes, you can do anything about unfair or selfishly directed commentary. You have to decide that your clothes are for you. Unless their obviously inappropriate for work, which I highly doubt, if other people have thoughts about them, f**k em.